Funny
Below we have our best selection of Funny quotes.
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Category: Funny
Category: Funny
Category: Funny
Category: Funny
How dare you open a spaceman's
helmet on an uncharted planet? My
eyeballs could've been sucked from
their sockets! (Buzz Lightyear)
Category: Funny
'I can't believe he didn't have the
dignity and presence of mind just
to get drunk and pass out in some
gutter,' said Jace. 'I must say,
I'm disappointed in the little
fellow.'
Category: Funny
'Self-knowledge is better than
self-control any day,' Raquel said
firmly. 'And I know myself well
enough to know how I act around
cookies.'
Category: Funny
And now," Eric yelled into his
mircophone, "we're going to sing a
new song-one we just wrote. This
one's for my girlfriend. We've been
going out for three weeks, and,
damn, our love is true. We're gonna
be together forever, baby. This
one's called 'Bang You Like a
Drum'.
Category: Funny
I think the warning labels on
alcoholic beverages are too bland.
They should be more vivid. Here is
one I would suggest: "Alcohol will
turn you into the same asshole your
father was.
Category: Funny
Category: Funny
He and the girl had almost nothing
to say to each other. One thing he
did say was, 'I ain't got any
tattoo on my back.'
'What you
got on it?' the girl said.
'My
shirt,' Parker said. 'Haw.'
'Haw, haw,' the girl said
politely.
